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Jokman's Corner

Scottish Arsenal fan, suffering from an over-estimation of wit. Wispa Gold saviour. Fanshare. Aspiring commentator.

Incredible Defence Keeping Arsenal Title Hopes Alive

Rightfully so, goalscorers are the players held up on a pedestal at their clubs. They are the ones who, with just one flick of their gaudy neon pink Nikes, can grab a goal that can turn a game or a season. A proven striker is elusive in the transfer market, lurking in the shadows like a predatory hobo, promising their admirers that with their addition, they too could touch glory, but only with their goals. 

The Ballon D’or winner was announced yesterday. The Top 3 were Cristiano Ronaldo, Lionel Messi and Franck Ribery. All attackers. These 3 players were rightfully lauded after yet another spectacular campaign. Where are the defenders though?  The last winner of this award that was a defender was Fabio Cannavaro in 2006. Maybe however, that just means that defence isn’t forgotten about, but just underappreciated. 

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The Middlesex Chicken Murder Mystery

The Place - a quaint village veterinary surgery somewhere amid the grassy knolls of Middlesex. 

It’s 9pm, thunder and lightning continue their volatile love affair in the skies above, broiling and mashing the skyline. The rain lashes the windows of the surgery, inhabited at this informal hour by the emergency doctor and his trusty assistant, the lolloping Joe Jordan. The Dr has been battling for hours to maintain a chickens life. The heartbeat tails off, the numbers all reset to zero. This fowl is failed. The Dr dips his head, smashes his fist against the table and sighs but then looks over the chart with Joe in order to find why this chicken flew so rapidly to the great big KFC in the sky.

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